Since Don is a 'Letter Carrier' he has gotten to know a lot of widows in the community. As long as we have lived in Oregon which is about 16yrs...we have been dedicated to loving, visiting and serving widows. As inspiring and noble as that may sound, the truth is we have received way more than we have ever given. It has not been easy dragging lots of little kids around cluttered, smelly homes and nursing homes. Older people can be bossy and demanding, we all can, but they feel like they are more entitled to. We have been a part of miracles as well as sad times. And as a result of most of our friends being between 70 and 100, when we see someone declining rapidly we usually put a priority on making an effort to visit them more often.
Joy Bergstrom is almost 93 and we have had the privilege of being her friend for about 6 years. Joy is a Christian, she is a beautiful woman of God, an encourager and filled with lots of life. She still lives alone and does most of her home maintenance on her own. As my kids have gotten older it has become more challenging to find the time to visit widows. Some of my kids ride their bikes on their own for a weekly visit. Even though I love Joy dearly I have been feeling pressure to find the time to get over to her house. I could tell I was squeezing it in when I rather anxiously rounded the kids up to go visit her Saturday afternoon, feeling a bit like I was marking off my to-do list. Joy is beginning to slow down and is showing her age and often talking about this life ending very soon for her. I walk up into her well-kept cold home and am greeted with hugs and kisses. She escorts me past doorways of plastic 'curtains' to the one section of her home that she keeps heated. My children know the routine, they get into the game cupboard and begin playing with Dominoes & PickUp sticks, probably in the original packaging. I sat down thinking I will be here for an hour and (in my mind) started "TRYING TO MINISTER" to Joy when she tells me she wants to share what "revelation" the Lord showed her yesterday. I knew I was gonna be here awhile. So I sat back and listened.
Joy told me that the day before a bunch of Seniors had gathered in her church to spend time praying and singing hymns together because the worship pastor does not play hymns or even know them. I find it amazing that these "Senior Saints" do not criticize the pastor or send complaint cards. He plays what he wants on Sundays and they defer to the rest of the congregation. Then these "Senior Saints" come together for mutual edification on another day.
Anyway her "revelation" was, how can so many people in one room be loving the same man and not be jealous? I feel conviction hit me that night as I realize I had come here to offer Joy a mere 1 hour of my day and she was offering me spiritual wisdom, depth, and insight. Joy, an old woman with nothing physical to offer me was giving me so very much. I can so clearly see the Gospel here because so often we think we are not free to come to Christ until we clean ourselves up and have something to offer Him. And yet he wants us to come as we are and let Him do all the work of cleaning us up and serving us as His bride. I spent several hours listening to Joy's stories of her precious life, her marriage, hardships, the diner they owned and lost as they filed for bankruptcy. Her husband had a heart attack and never fully recovered then passed away. The fire that took everything materially, no money, God's provision for her every need and at the end of the day a woman who has such a shaking voice due to vocal cord issues telling me how much she loves Jesus, how she continues to grow, like a child. She does not understand how but HE always provides and she is learning to trust in this Man more then ever as she will very soon spend eternity with Him. I can see her real faith, a real love, and real relationship with Him.
Have you ever thought about Joy's revelation? All of us loving the same Person without jealousy? I am sure I would not do well with a bunch of ladies loving my husband. My revelation in this was maybe I do not feel jealous about others loving my Lord but I do treat them as if I were. I have found myself being self-righteous, competitive, judging, not caring, loving or extending grace to other Jesus lovers. I have, at times, treated the Bride as the other Woman.
